Alright, friends and family, it is about time I get out of this hellish place called UniLodge. So a few days ago, the light in my bathroom wouldn’t turn on, but they fixed it a couple days later, but now it doesn’t work again. So they just posted a sign on the door saying to use bathrooms on other floors where the light does work, because they can’t get someone to fix it until Monday.
-__-
So, coming back from this jazz club tonight, I walked past the bathroom, saw the sign, then took the elevator down one floor to use their bathroom.
Oh guess what? This bathroom’s pretty much flooded! The floor is completely covered in water. They had to make up for the fact that the lights weren’t broken, so they messed up the plumbing. Not to mention there was no toilet paper in the stall…
Really??? Really!!! What the heck is going on with this place??? My lights won’t work, there’s a whole in the hallway window, downstairs the bathroom’s flooded. I wonder what’s wrong with the other floors. Monika said when she lived here her fridge smelled like a decomposing body, so that’s a start.
You know, earlier today, I felt sort of weirdly bad for leaving UniLodge, like I’m giving up or something and it could be some great learning experience to stick it out here blah blah blah. Like I just met this guy this morning in the elevator, who was extremely friendly and I feel like I would like to know him better, but I doubt I will ever see him again if I leave UniLodge. So I felt sort of bad for leaving. Like, awww, now I won’t know this one friendly guy. Well, now I don’t feel bad. :)
Maybe in the next couple days of me still being here, I will see the guy again, I think his name was Hugh, and we will become biffles (best friends forever, for you older generation folks) and then we will make sure to exchange numbers and hang out all the time even after I leave. Possible. Not probable. Too bad.
So now I am holed up in my room, as far away from the extreme discomfort I get near the bathrooms or kitchen (though the discomfort is seeping in… the handle fell off of one of my drawers. !!!), in my jammies and slippers, with my heater on and the rest of my Mint Crush Tim Tams, and I will tell you about my day.
* side note: the handle of my dresser drawer! Like, oh my God! The place is crumbling down around me! I HAVE to get out!!! *
today I did a lot of things. I first dropped off a copy of my original housing application at Queens, came back a while later so they had a chance to look at it (luckily I listed Queen’s as one of my top 3 colleges I wanted to go to) aaaaaaaaand they officially ACCEPTED MEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOO I LOVE THE WORLD!!!!! I think the whole housing application process thing was a bit of a formality, because the Vice Master seemed to really like me, and I really liked him, and they really wanted to fill the room. So I ran back to UniLodge and I was like “FILL MY ROOM ASAP” and they were like, “okay, okay, calm down” and I ran off singing show tunes.
I have actually had some funny songs stuck in my head these past couple of days. Songs that fit my situation. Like “Part of you World” from Little Mermaid, and “Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want” by The Smiths, and “I Want You to Want Me” by… whoever that is.
After that, I skyped with my daddio to let him know the deal, and then Olivia and I just went into the city to sort of waste time and do some shopping. The first shopping I’ve done here! Which would seem like a feat for me, but here in Australia, the fashion is different. Not in an obvious way, but when I look at clothes, most of them don’t attract me right away, because they’re just not quite… there. They’re just different. And I am also quite the bargain hunter, so most things are just too expensive. I might have to get used to that, though, because lost things here are more expensive than they would be in the States.
Olivia is still having a bit off a tough time here, because she gets homesick pretty easily, so I just hung out with her the rest of the night. We went to dinner at Queens, where I met more people who I told I would be moving in with. They were all very excited for me! And all congratulatory that I got in. Maybe they feel it is pretty exclusive to live there. Well, the Vice Master said the Australian students are “sent through the ringer” when it comes to applying and getting in. The international students don’t have it so bad, but there still was no room for me on campus originally, so…
Anyway, we went to dinner, then hung out with the people on her floor. It is actually AWESOME that they all hang out in the hallway. Because then you can just go out your door and say hi or sit down and chill out. A bunch of people tonight were going to a 21st birthday party for someone in Queens. I guess 21st’s are a big thing here too… even though they don’t mean anything… it’s kind of weird. I think they just like an excuse to all dress up in theme. The theme for tonight’s was Arabian. The boys looked HILARIOUS with makeshift turbans that matched their ties and/or pants. One guy was wearing slightly see-through pants, because they were flowy and Arabian-ish, like Aladdin pants. Or MC Hammer. Either way, they were all really interested in meeting me and were excited for me to come and were all fun and easy to talk to. I spoke to more guys than girls, I think, which was interesting. I’ve always been more of a girls’ girl.
Those guys all went to the birthday party, which Olivia wasn’t invited to because she didn’t know the girl all that well. Then I convinced Olivia to go the jazz club that a couple people were going to, including this one guy, Ray, who was on her floor and who was very nice and wanted us to come. I just thought Olivia needed to get out and have something take her mind off of missing home. I’m not sure if it worked, but at least it was something to do. Olivia tends to not think in the present, so she will think about how long it is until she goes home, or until her parents come to visit, or if she might be able to leave early, stuff like that. That’s really detrimental, I think, to her having fun here. You can’t just be counting down to going to home all the time. You won’t be able to appreciate what you’re doing here.
The jazz club was … interesting. Haha I’ve never been to a jazz club, I don’t think, but it was sort of just what I expected. It was dark and small; everyone got quiet and watched the performers when they were onstage. I felt a little awkward because I didn’t have a scarf or thick-rimmed glasses. Soooo hipster. I saw many little bobbing hipster heads in the audience. Seriously, the guys there had that sort of fancy trimmed facial hair, like a goatee or thin beard outlining their jaw. They looked like Collin Farrell on a really bad, bad day. Not quite so attractive, though. I think the people from Queens who we came with went because a girl living in Queens’ brother was playing saxophone.
Olivia and Kirsten (another “Queener” as they would call her) and I all went back at the little break between sets they took. I just came back to UniLodge, because I can’t quite move into Queens just yet, and Olivia and Kirsten went to Queens. I’m thinking I will pack up some things tomorrow, even if I don’t get a call that they’ve filled my room. I’ll just be prepared when they do call. :)
And I think Olivia and I will go to St. Kilda tomorrow. Which is supposed to be this really pretty beachy place near the shore somewhere.
Oh, and I got my concession card today! Which means my tram tickets are half price. Awesome. So yep, I need to go to bed now. I am almost over this cold, it is almost gone. So I just need to get good sleep and take some more vitamin C and work it out. Goodnight! Or g’day! Whatever. I love and miss everyone a TON! xoxoxo
Friday, July 30, 2010
WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
I GOT INTO QUEENS I GOT INTO QUEENS YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!
So, I told UniLodge that I want to leave as soon as possible, and I am going to bug them every day about filling my room, and I am going to pack up my stuff and I am going to move to Queens! Wahahahaaa! Cha-CHING. Now let's do this thing.
So, I told UniLodge that I want to leave as soon as possible, and I am going to bug them every day about filling my room, and I am going to pack up my stuff and I am going to move to Queens! Wahahahaaa! Cha-CHING. Now let's do this thing.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
The Zoo!
In PICTURES!!!! Ta-da!
Oh by the way, I think if you don't have facebook, you can click this link and be able to see all of my first album on there:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=237197&id=708177577&l=73928e747f
and here's the second one!:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=240346&id=708177577&l=3ac7b2f64b
Peacocks walking around all willy nilly. ... :/
The butterfly house. I want to LIVE there. It's amazing.
The humidity kept fogging up my camera, but it made this cool effect. Very pretty. :)
Cocoons!
Mom, you should do this!!!
the entry to the butterfly house.
Hee hee cute.
Awwww sleeping orangutan!
These guys could seriously swing off of anything.
Giraffes and zebras! Hangin out. Munchin some food.
KANGAROOOOOS!
UGGHHHH SO CUUUUUTE!!!
Wombats!
Koala Bear!
Sleeping koala!!!! awwwww!
This is the bird of flight cage thing. You could just walk through!
We were walking amongst these birds. They were just flying around freely. :)
It was beautiful in there.
KOOKABURRA.
I LOVED the seals. I think I would want to be a seal, if I were an animal.
Oh, hey there!
PENGUINS.
Come on, lion! Wake up! Be ferocious!
A Pumbaa-style animal! I can't remember what it was called..
Creepy little crocodile...
Tigers!!
Oh by the way, I think if you don't have facebook, you can click this link and be able to see all of my first album on there:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=237197&id=708177577&l=73928e747f
and here's the second one!:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=240346&id=708177577&l=3ac7b2f64b
Peacocks walking around all willy nilly. ... :/
The butterfly house. I want to LIVE there. It's amazing. 
The humidity kept fogging up my camera, but it made this cool effect. Very pretty. :)
Cocoons!
Mom, you should do this!!! 
the entry to the butterfly house. 
Hee hee cute. 
Awwww sleeping orangutan! 
These guys could seriously swing off of anything. 
Giraffes and zebras! Hangin out. Munchin some food. 
KANGAROOOOOS! 
UGGHHHH SO CUUUUUTE!!! 
Wombats! 
Koala Bear! 
Sleeping koala!!!! awwwww!
This is the bird of flight cage thing. You could just walk through! 
We were walking amongst these birds. They were just flying around freely. :)
It was beautiful in there. 
KOOKABURRA. 
I LOVED the seals. I think I would want to be a seal, if I were an animal.
Oh, hey there! 
PENGUINS. 
Come on, lion! Wake up! Be ferocious!
A Pumbaa-style animal! I can't remember what it was called..
Creepy little crocodile... 
Tigers!!
Australian Food...?
Here is a photo of the food I ate at the Australian Food tasting... I ate crocodile, emu, quail egg, duck, prawns, and.... KANGAROO CHORIZO!!! And it was tasty!! I feel awful. After I saw the sweet adorable kangaroos at the zoo, I just felt awful about this. Chorizo is kind of delicious though... :/
The Deal-io
First of all, thank you guys so SO much for all the supportive comments! I really needed them to help me to be assertive and whiney and to get what I want.
Today, I fulfilled all of my game plan. My plan was to talk to Queen’s College and get them to want me to live there and to talk to UniLodge and whine a lot so they would take pity on my and let me know when there is someone who wants to take my room right away so I can move out to Queen’s.
Firstly today, I got a reply from the email I sent last night to Oxy telling them how upset I am with my situation at UniLodge and that there are open rooms at Queen’s looking for someone to fill them. Oxy warned me that there may already be a waiting list for Queen’s, but also told me I should first speak to Queen’s and see if I can get a room there and then go to UniLodge and ask them if they can end my contract early. Oxy also told me all this schmutzy “here’s how to make friends” stuff and “we know it’s hard to study abroad at first” crap (oh, thanks, I didn’t know how to make friends and what was that? Oh my gosh, it’s hard to study abroad? Wow I just couldn’t tell!) But honestly, I don’t want to stick it out here anymore. If I can live in Queen’s, I am just going to live in Queen’s.
So with that go-ahead to go see if people will let this happen, I went over to Queen’s, just to see who I could talk to, and it turns out the woman I emailed wanted to make an appointment with me and the Vice Master, who would be the person who ultimately lets me into the college. So she just set me up with the Vice Master today at 4 pm.
Then I went to the front desk of UniLodge to ask about my contract. Well, first it was too busy for me to ask anyone anything because they are always understaffed and very busy, but I went back later and the wonderful woman who helped me my first day was there! Now, I think she is to the point where she will just say whatever she can to keep me happy so I’m not bawling at her desk again. So I explained to her how unhappy I am there, and that I might have an offer to live at Queen’s and I would love love love to live there and that my world would go from a place of darkness and loneliness to a magical world of sunshine and rainbows, so she let me leave my cell number with her so that I can give her the go-ahead when I have an offer at Queen’s and then she can call me any time anyone wants a room and I can tell her to give them my room and then I will move out then and there!
After that, I went off to Queen’s again to meet with the Vice Master so he can feel me out, I guess, because it seems like it’s pretty exclusive to live there…? Or at least that’s how he made it sound. He was very nice. It seems like he really gets to know his students and stays involved in their lives. So he just asked me about my GPA, my major, Oxy, where I’m from, brothers and sisters, stuff like that. He talked at me a little bit, just about the American economy and how it is currently down the drain. Then at the end he said he couldn’t make a guarantee, but that it was certainly an option. I can’t remember exactly how he put it, I just remember the words “can’t guarantee.” But I think once I bring in my stuff from my original on-campus housing application tomorrow, they will hopefully give me a thumbs up. Or something. It seemed like the Vice Master wanted to make sure I could get out of my contract at UniLodge before he offered me the room, but I think I need an offer at Queen’s before I can tell them to advertise my room for rent at Unilodge.
The rooms at UniLodge seem to go pretty fast, like people are still coming in every day and moving in. so I believe people are still constantly looking for a room. I usually see student-types at the front desk with their parents asking about rooms. And my room is slightly bigger, so maybe it will be more in demand! So I’m hoping to get an offer from queens and tell Unilodge that I ready to move out and then my room will be rented out within a couple days. So for Unilodge, I will have to pay for the couple of weeks that I’ve been here and a termination fee, which I think costs as much as a week’s rent. And then I can get the rest back and give it to queens, and then get the rest of the payment sent from Oxy. Siiiiiggggghhhh. Please oh please let this happen.
For tomorrow, I have to go to the International Student Centre to get my original housing application, then I can bring it to queens and let them know that I will be able to leave Unilodge, I would just have to pay the rent until someone fills the room, and that I need their offer to advertise my room. Then hopefully I will get the offer, then I can either stay at UniLodge and just pack my bags up and wait for someone to come along or I can move all my stuff to Queens as long as they let me move in before they have the entire payment for the semester.
BWAAAAAJEOJFAOFAIFHIHWFORGJFPAWFJVNIGHSM
I just have to get out of here. I won’t take no for an answer. Olivia plans to help me move out. :) She has just been the best person here. I may need her to bring one of her suitcases, though, to hold all the stuff I have accumulated here … : /
Then I may need to ship that stuff home, because I can’t just get rid of it! It would be such a waste! And I will use it again, of course.
I just need to get out of this rut and into the part of my time abroad where I love life and everyone I meet and I have such a great time, which is what you’re supposed to do while you’re abroad. I think I can get to that point once I move to queens. I have already seen a lot of cute boys there… ; )
I am so over being stressed out and sad and slightly lost. So please cross your fingers for me! Let’s also hope I get some actual sleep tonight, too.
I love and miss everyone! I always say that, but I really mean it. It is so strange to be in a foreign country away from everyone you love. You’re all in my thoughts!
Xoxoxo D
Today, I fulfilled all of my game plan. My plan was to talk to Queen’s College and get them to want me to live there and to talk to UniLodge and whine a lot so they would take pity on my and let me know when there is someone who wants to take my room right away so I can move out to Queen’s.
Firstly today, I got a reply from the email I sent last night to Oxy telling them how upset I am with my situation at UniLodge and that there are open rooms at Queen’s looking for someone to fill them. Oxy warned me that there may already be a waiting list for Queen’s, but also told me I should first speak to Queen’s and see if I can get a room there and then go to UniLodge and ask them if they can end my contract early. Oxy also told me all this schmutzy “here’s how to make friends” stuff and “we know it’s hard to study abroad at first” crap (oh, thanks, I didn’t know how to make friends and what was that? Oh my gosh, it’s hard to study abroad? Wow I just couldn’t tell!) But honestly, I don’t want to stick it out here anymore. If I can live in Queen’s, I am just going to live in Queen’s.
So with that go-ahead to go see if people will let this happen, I went over to Queen’s, just to see who I could talk to, and it turns out the woman I emailed wanted to make an appointment with me and the Vice Master, who would be the person who ultimately lets me into the college. So she just set me up with the Vice Master today at 4 pm.
Then I went to the front desk of UniLodge to ask about my contract. Well, first it was too busy for me to ask anyone anything because they are always understaffed and very busy, but I went back later and the wonderful woman who helped me my first day was there! Now, I think she is to the point where she will just say whatever she can to keep me happy so I’m not bawling at her desk again. So I explained to her how unhappy I am there, and that I might have an offer to live at Queen’s and I would love love love to live there and that my world would go from a place of darkness and loneliness to a magical world of sunshine and rainbows, so she let me leave my cell number with her so that I can give her the go-ahead when I have an offer at Queen’s and then she can call me any time anyone wants a room and I can tell her to give them my room and then I will move out then and there!
After that, I went off to Queen’s again to meet with the Vice Master so he can feel me out, I guess, because it seems like it’s pretty exclusive to live there…? Or at least that’s how he made it sound. He was very nice. It seems like he really gets to know his students and stays involved in their lives. So he just asked me about my GPA, my major, Oxy, where I’m from, brothers and sisters, stuff like that. He talked at me a little bit, just about the American economy and how it is currently down the drain. Then at the end he said he couldn’t make a guarantee, but that it was certainly an option. I can’t remember exactly how he put it, I just remember the words “can’t guarantee.” But I think once I bring in my stuff from my original on-campus housing application tomorrow, they will hopefully give me a thumbs up. Or something. It seemed like the Vice Master wanted to make sure I could get out of my contract at UniLodge before he offered me the room, but I think I need an offer at Queen’s before I can tell them to advertise my room for rent at Unilodge.
The rooms at UniLodge seem to go pretty fast, like people are still coming in every day and moving in. so I believe people are still constantly looking for a room. I usually see student-types at the front desk with their parents asking about rooms. And my room is slightly bigger, so maybe it will be more in demand! So I’m hoping to get an offer from queens and tell Unilodge that I ready to move out and then my room will be rented out within a couple days. So for Unilodge, I will have to pay for the couple of weeks that I’ve been here and a termination fee, which I think costs as much as a week’s rent. And then I can get the rest back and give it to queens, and then get the rest of the payment sent from Oxy. Siiiiiggggghhhh. Please oh please let this happen.
For tomorrow, I have to go to the International Student Centre to get my original housing application, then I can bring it to queens and let them know that I will be able to leave Unilodge, I would just have to pay the rent until someone fills the room, and that I need their offer to advertise my room. Then hopefully I will get the offer, then I can either stay at UniLodge and just pack my bags up and wait for someone to come along or I can move all my stuff to Queens as long as they let me move in before they have the entire payment for the semester.
BWAAAAAJEOJFAOFAIFHIHWFORGJFPAWFJVNIGHSM
I just have to get out of here. I won’t take no for an answer. Olivia plans to help me move out. :) She has just been the best person here. I may need her to bring one of her suitcases, though, to hold all the stuff I have accumulated here … : /
Then I may need to ship that stuff home, because I can’t just get rid of it! It would be such a waste! And I will use it again, of course.
I just need to get out of this rut and into the part of my time abroad where I love life and everyone I meet and I have such a great time, which is what you’re supposed to do while you’re abroad. I think I can get to that point once I move to queens. I have already seen a lot of cute boys there… ; )
I am so over being stressed out and sad and slightly lost. So please cross your fingers for me! Let’s also hope I get some actual sleep tonight, too.
I love and miss everyone! I always say that, but I really mean it. It is so strange to be in a foreign country away from everyone you love. You’re all in my thoughts!
Xoxoxo D
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Drained
D:
It's Wednesday night.
I am feeling overall not so great. Actually, I feel like crap, and I am stuck in Crapton, a suburb of Craptown, a city in Crapland, capital of Crap Country.
I feel like I have been really good about letting things roll off my back, and just getting in the mindset that things will be shakey here for a little while, I just need to get into a comfortable flow and everything will eventually be good, but right now I just have this immense feeling that I want to be with my family, and I want a hug. All I want is a hug.
All I want is someone to help me take care of my life here, rather than me take care of everything. I am just not used to so much responsibility and things to think about, and so, so much that I have to let roll of my back.
“That’s alright, I didn’t have housing at first and I didn’t know if I had a place to sleep my first night here, but now it’s ok.”
“That’s alright, I don’t have sheets for now, it’s ok to sleep under my jackets one night.”
“That’s alright, just a few of my strawberries were taken, it probably won’t happen again if I label everything.”
“That’s alright, the bathroom light doesn’t work, so after 5:30 pm it is complete darkness in the bathroom. And it’s ok that there is no heat in there and they leave the windows open, I only have to be in there when I take showers or have to use the restroom.”
“Well, someone at the rest of my yogurt, but that’s alright, I guess I will just have to buy more and label it … better…”
“That’s alright, Monika left to live at a different, nicer student housing building… I will be okay on my own here, I can handle it…”
Some of these things are really getting to me.
So here’s the story. Monika left earlier today to go live in RMIT Village, a student housing building, like UniLodge, except you get your own kitchen and bathroom, the heating works, and you get a balcony and pool. And it’s for about the same price. When Monika was first talking about how much she liked it there compared to here, I thought, well, I should stick it out, because I have to face adversity and be strong and grateful for the situation I’m in, because I could have much worse. So I put that out of my head that I would ever move out of UniLodge. But now that Monika has moved out, and pretty easily, at that, I feel like maybe I should aim for something better.
Olivia, who lives on campus at Queen’s College, told me that there are rooms open in her college since some students dropped out because they didn’t pass or moved off-campus, or something like that. If I lived on campus, I wouldn’t have to cook for myself, I would actually get to know the people I live with, and I would be a part of the school’s community. I feel like this would take a lot of financial work, like moving the money wired to UniLodge to Queen’s, where Oxy would have to send more money because it is more expensive to live on campus than here, and also sending back the stipend Oxy sent me for food (since I don’t have a meal plan), etc.
I really want to do it though. I have emailed Oxy about my idea, and I emailed Queen’s about wanting to move there, and that I would apply if need be, and anything else they would need me to do. I just have to figure out if I can get out of the contract here at UniLodge.
I want to move to Queen’s soooooo badly. I feel extremely alone here. If I moved to Queen’s, I would know someone really well already, Olivia, and I would get to know Australian students. In on campus housing, they really emphasize community and have an open door policy, and while I was hanging out at Queen’s with Olivia, everyone would hang out in the hallways, playing cards and talking, and they are always really friendly and interested in you. Absolutely no one does that here. And at Queen’s, you get a fridge in your room, and internet comes with your room, and access to a network with shared movies and tv. I mean, that’s all sort of extra. I just want to have friends where I live.
I think what sent me over the edge and into the “I need to move out of here” mode was that someone at my yogurt and that Monika moved out. With the yogurt, I just thought, no one has respect for my personal stuff and I really feel like I can’t trust people here with my stuff. And with Monika leaving, I just remember I couldn’t process it right away. I was leaving for class when I saw her with all her stuff packed up. Then in class, I didn’t think about it all. Then I came back from class and got in the shower, and that’s when I realized that, while I was truly happy for her, I was extremely sad for me, and I just broke down. I don’t want to be alone in a place like this.
I know I can’t get my hopes up too much, because I might not be able to move out of here, but I am setting my mind to trying everything possible to get into one of the rooms at Queen’s. I also feel bad that I bought all these things for this kind of living, like a heater and cooking utensils and groceries, and I wouldn’t need them if I were in Queen’s. I just hope that I will get support from Oxy and Queen’s and from you guys, so that I can try my best to get out of this contract and move out of here.
I got some advice from Monika on how she moved out. She said she bothered them a lot, and stressed that she would do anything to move out, and luckily there was someone looking for a room her size, and they told her if she can move out that day, they would end the contract. So she did that. And another girl before her said she made up a list of all the things that were unsatisfactory at UniLodge and made them see that she felt she shouldn’t be paying for such unsatisfactory living arrangements, so they let her leave.
I would probably have to pay for the couple of weeks I have been here, though. I think that’s alright, though. I believe that, because we have to pay full Oxy tuition for one semester, paying all these things should be fine with them, because tuition at the university is actually about $15,000 a year, or something like that, so there is a huge difference in what we are paying Oxy and what is actually going to the university. So more expensive housing on campus should be fine. I wonder if I am making any sense right now. I am not good at figuring out finances or anything, I just know that Olivia said that Oxy is paying for her housing because we have to pay full tuition at Oxy, which is a whole lot more than tuition here.
Anyway, I hope to get full support from Oxy/maybe have them talk to the UniLodge people in case they don’t let me leave by just me asking, and I hope Queen’s wants another American student to fill an empty room, and I hope I can move out of here asap and have everything work out. There’s no harm in trying, right? If I am very unsatisfied with something, which I totally am, I should see if I can change it, right? Anyway, I am going to make a game plan for tomorrow, so I can use my time in between classes to talk to housing people and figure out payments, etc.
So please do give me any feedback if you have any advice! I love getting comments. Oh, and I hope you guys liked the pictures! I will keep posting! I really, really hope this works out! Sending all my love! I miss everyone so much! Xoxoxo!
It's Wednesday night.
I am feeling overall not so great. Actually, I feel like crap, and I am stuck in Crapton, a suburb of Craptown, a city in Crapland, capital of Crap Country.
I feel like I have been really good about letting things roll off my back, and just getting in the mindset that things will be shakey here for a little while, I just need to get into a comfortable flow and everything will eventually be good, but right now I just have this immense feeling that I want to be with my family, and I want a hug. All I want is a hug.
All I want is someone to help me take care of my life here, rather than me take care of everything. I am just not used to so much responsibility and things to think about, and so, so much that I have to let roll of my back.
“That’s alright, I didn’t have housing at first and I didn’t know if I had a place to sleep my first night here, but now it’s ok.”
“That’s alright, I don’t have sheets for now, it’s ok to sleep under my jackets one night.”
“That’s alright, just a few of my strawberries were taken, it probably won’t happen again if I label everything.”
“That’s alright, the bathroom light doesn’t work, so after 5:30 pm it is complete darkness in the bathroom. And it’s ok that there is no heat in there and they leave the windows open, I only have to be in there when I take showers or have to use the restroom.”
“Well, someone at the rest of my yogurt, but that’s alright, I guess I will just have to buy more and label it … better…”
“That’s alright, Monika left to live at a different, nicer student housing building… I will be okay on my own here, I can handle it…”
Some of these things are really getting to me.
So here’s the story. Monika left earlier today to go live in RMIT Village, a student housing building, like UniLodge, except you get your own kitchen and bathroom, the heating works, and you get a balcony and pool. And it’s for about the same price. When Monika was first talking about how much she liked it there compared to here, I thought, well, I should stick it out, because I have to face adversity and be strong and grateful for the situation I’m in, because I could have much worse. So I put that out of my head that I would ever move out of UniLodge. But now that Monika has moved out, and pretty easily, at that, I feel like maybe I should aim for something better.
Olivia, who lives on campus at Queen’s College, told me that there are rooms open in her college since some students dropped out because they didn’t pass or moved off-campus, or something like that. If I lived on campus, I wouldn’t have to cook for myself, I would actually get to know the people I live with, and I would be a part of the school’s community. I feel like this would take a lot of financial work, like moving the money wired to UniLodge to Queen’s, where Oxy would have to send more money because it is more expensive to live on campus than here, and also sending back the stipend Oxy sent me for food (since I don’t have a meal plan), etc.
I really want to do it though. I have emailed Oxy about my idea, and I emailed Queen’s about wanting to move there, and that I would apply if need be, and anything else they would need me to do. I just have to figure out if I can get out of the contract here at UniLodge.
I want to move to Queen’s soooooo badly. I feel extremely alone here. If I moved to Queen’s, I would know someone really well already, Olivia, and I would get to know Australian students. In on campus housing, they really emphasize community and have an open door policy, and while I was hanging out at Queen’s with Olivia, everyone would hang out in the hallways, playing cards and talking, and they are always really friendly and interested in you. Absolutely no one does that here. And at Queen’s, you get a fridge in your room, and internet comes with your room, and access to a network with shared movies and tv. I mean, that’s all sort of extra. I just want to have friends where I live.
I think what sent me over the edge and into the “I need to move out of here” mode was that someone at my yogurt and that Monika moved out. With the yogurt, I just thought, no one has respect for my personal stuff and I really feel like I can’t trust people here with my stuff. And with Monika leaving, I just remember I couldn’t process it right away. I was leaving for class when I saw her with all her stuff packed up. Then in class, I didn’t think about it all. Then I came back from class and got in the shower, and that’s when I realized that, while I was truly happy for her, I was extremely sad for me, and I just broke down. I don’t want to be alone in a place like this.
I know I can’t get my hopes up too much, because I might not be able to move out of here, but I am setting my mind to trying everything possible to get into one of the rooms at Queen’s. I also feel bad that I bought all these things for this kind of living, like a heater and cooking utensils and groceries, and I wouldn’t need them if I were in Queen’s. I just hope that I will get support from Oxy and Queen’s and from you guys, so that I can try my best to get out of this contract and move out of here.
I got some advice from Monika on how she moved out. She said she bothered them a lot, and stressed that she would do anything to move out, and luckily there was someone looking for a room her size, and they told her if she can move out that day, they would end the contract. So she did that. And another girl before her said she made up a list of all the things that were unsatisfactory at UniLodge and made them see that she felt she shouldn’t be paying for such unsatisfactory living arrangements, so they let her leave.
I would probably have to pay for the couple of weeks I have been here, though. I think that’s alright, though. I believe that, because we have to pay full Oxy tuition for one semester, paying all these things should be fine with them, because tuition at the university is actually about $15,000 a year, or something like that, so there is a huge difference in what we are paying Oxy and what is actually going to the university. So more expensive housing on campus should be fine. I wonder if I am making any sense right now. I am not good at figuring out finances or anything, I just know that Olivia said that Oxy is paying for her housing because we have to pay full tuition at Oxy, which is a whole lot more than tuition here.
Anyway, I hope to get full support from Oxy/maybe have them talk to the UniLodge people in case they don’t let me leave by just me asking, and I hope Queen’s wants another American student to fill an empty room, and I hope I can move out of here asap and have everything work out. There’s no harm in trying, right? If I am very unsatisfied with something, which I totally am, I should see if I can change it, right? Anyway, I am going to make a game plan for tomorrow, so I can use my time in between classes to talk to housing people and figure out payments, etc.
So please do give me any feedback if you have any advice! I love getting comments. Oh, and I hope you guys liked the pictures! I will keep posting! I really, really hope this works out! Sending all my love! I miss everyone so much! Xoxoxo!
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
MY YOGURT.
IS GONE.
WHAT'S WITH THIS. Do I have to buy my own fridge in order to feel like my stuff will be safe??? I had just a little bit more yogurt left, just enough for one more breakfast, and someone ate it and threw out the container. !!!! How sweet of them.
I really can't believe this. I am just really upset and I don't have much faith in anyone I live with now. It didn't have a label on it, but it was in a bag with my name on it. REALLY. I just.... ARGH.
WHAT'S WITH THIS. Do I have to buy my own fridge in order to feel like my stuff will be safe??? I had just a little bit more yogurt left, just enough for one more breakfast, and someone ate it and threw out the container. !!!! How sweet of them.
I really can't believe this. I am just really upset and I don't have much faith in anyone I live with now. It didn't have a label on it, but it was in a bag with my name on it. REALLY. I just.... ARGH.
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